10/09/2026
I feel like I owe people an apology, because I feel I've kinda dropped the ball a bit this summer.
At the beginning of the holidays, I found out that a family friend had died through su***de.
It's been impossible to understand - my first words were "but he was so handsome!".
He was one of the good guys, seemingly successful and ever so popular, surrounded by a huge group of friends. He always made an effort to say hello and ask after my siblings when we'd see each other at events.
Over the summer the usual phrases have rattled through my head, "why didn't he say something", "why didn't someone notice and check in on him", but immediately argued with these points before I've even finished uttering them.
How can you speak out when you're supposed to be the strong one, the one that people turn to for support. And I'm pretty sure friends will have 'checked' in and there's only so much people can do, adulting and lifing is busy and hard enough to stay on track and on top of things yourself.
The whole experience has been so very triggering, I've not had the headspace to carry on as normal and have also tried to spend and treasure more time with the child.
Today is Su***de Prevention Day, so I thought it would be timely to share these tips offered by the Samaritans.
If you're struggling, please do reach out to someone - I know more than anyone how easy that is to say and impossible to do.
But, there are people who care and organisations set up to help. Don't suffer in silence.