01/04/2026
It still gives me pause when I hear people suggest that saying a proper goodbye to a loved one is optional. Increasingly, there are messages that encourage us to see a farewell as something that can be simplified or even skipped altogether.
From my own experience, I have come to believe that a meaningful goodbye is not really for the person who has died, but for those of us who remain. It is part of how we process grief, how we acknowledge a life, and how we begin to find a sense of closure.
I lost my father in 2021, during the lockdown period. At the time, I was not allowed to attend his cremation, gather with family, or say goodbye in person. That absence of a farewell left something unfinished, and I have come to realise just how important those moments are in helping us move through grief.
Everyone’s circumstances and choices are different, and there is no single right way to honour a life. But it is worth thinking carefully about what a goodbye means to you and your family, not only in the moment, but in the years that follow. Saving money can solve many practical concerns, but the opportunity to say farewell is something that cannot be recreated later.
Sometimes, the value of a proper goodbye only becomes clear once the chance has passed.
