Heather David at The Final Piece

23/06/2023

An awful lot has happened since I last posted. My beloved younger brother died on 9th January leaving us all bereft. I continued to conduct funerals finding solace through helping others to celebrate their loved ones in unique ways. At the beginning of April my husband and I fulfilled a long held dream to live by the sea and moved to the gorgeous little fishing village of Mevagissey on the Cornish coast. I hope to be able to serve families here just as I have done for the last seven years in Yorkshire and most excitingly I will also be offering celebrant led weddings and vow renewals with the stunning local scenery as a backdrop. I’m trained in all aspects of celebrancy and have conducted hundreds of weddings in my role as a registrar - it will be wonderful to explore with couples the full range of what is possible for a ceremony as I move forward into this next big adventure. Please do enquire on 07824 770114 if you would be interested in any of the above

31/12/2022

Going forward into a New Year leaving the year when someone you love died can be very poignant. It can feel as if you are somehow leaving them behind. This is a little reminder that your memories are always with you. Wishing you all peace, health and happiness in 2023

11/12/2022

When Mum died five years ago I kept a diary of the last week of her life which I shared with this organisation, Compassion in Dying. Based in part on that and subsequent interviews with me this was published as a blog for Grief Awareness Week.

“She had a very good death and I was just really grateful she got what she wanted.”

28/09/2022

This is amazing. I often use the analogy of the Tree of Life in my funeral services to illustrate the wonderful continuity of life despite the inevitability of death:

The death of each of us is in the order of things; it follows life as surely as night follows day. We can take the tree of life as a symbol. The human race is the trunk and branches of this tree, and individual men and women are the leaves which appear one season, flourish for a summer and then die. We too are like leaves on this tree and one day we will be torn off by a storm, or we will simply decay and fall and mingle with the earth at its roots. But, whilst we live, we are conscious of the tree's flowing sap and steadfast strength. Deep down in our consciousness is the consciousness of a collective life, a life of which we are all a part and to which we make a minute but unique contribution. When we die and fall, the tree remains nourished to some small degree by our manifestation of life. Millions of leaves have preceded us and millions will follow us but the tree itself grows and endures.

When this olive tree sprouted, 4000 years ago, about 2000 BC.
In China someone was discovering Bronze and the last mammoth was hunted by humans. The Egyptian Seventh Dynasty was over, and in Crete King Minos began construction of the palace that would inspire the myth of the Minotaur and his labyrinth...
The same time this tree sprouted was when our species discovered the existence of glass .
The tree, found in Greece, has seen man walk from the Bronze Age and into the Atomic Age, and today. It has seen the world change, seen kings, despots, politicians, poets, warriors and prophets rise and die. It has gone through many, countless wars. And it still continues to give olives every season....

21/08/2022

Yesterday evening I attended a celebration of life. I had no professional input to the proceedings and it was wonderful. The gentleman whose life we were celebrating was someone who had a deep faith but had made his wishes known, before dementia ravaged his mind and body, that he didn’t want a traditional funeral. Instead we were invited to an evening of food, drink and memories (and a Buster Keeton movie!). The “disposal” took place weeks earlier in a direct cremation. It was so lovely - joyful and uplifting. Thank you Marta and Amanda for honouring Jack’s wishes.

10/07/2022

This is such an interesting read. I am a great advocate of making a funeral exactly what you or the person who has died would like. I conducted a service recently in a marquee in a private garden with the family dog wandering around amongst us. The service was full of happy memories. Whilst close family and I attended to the committal at a beautiful and peaceful woodland burial ground about fifteen miles away, the caterers moved in and the party started, under the direction of loving and trusted friends until the others got back. Sadly it was a young man who had died and nothing could make that better but everyone felt that it was a great send off for him and it felt like at the end of the party everyone was just waiting for him to come in and thank us for the party 💕

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2022/jul/10/why-a-good-funeral-can-be-a-life-affirming-occasion?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other&fbclid=IwAR2VpytAvpqp_EwL1CDmYTAtuA2qoocqRRknymotDUa9715mU2E0wlsKWfw&fs=e&s=cl

As well as tears there’s cake and laughter: remembering a well-lived life is a very human affair

04/06/2022

Caleb Wilde is an American Funeral Director who has written a couple of books. This is a quote from one of them and I thought it worth sharing

We are alive and dead. We are dead and alive.

12/05/2022

A very talented colleague of mine has written this poem which explains very eloquently what we celebrants strive to achieve for the families we are asked to help. Thank you Gwyn!

What Is A Celebrant? - Written By Gwyn Davies
Celebrant, Celebrant, what is it you do?
I’m a little old fashioned and haven’t a clue.
Celebrant, Celebrant, what is it you do?
Are you religious, or is that taboo?
Who is your target, where is your goal?
I’m a little confused, as to what is your role.
Are you religious, or the atheist sort,
I’m a bit in the dark and need to be taught.
Well let me enlighten, I’ll try and explain,
I’m there as a person to try ease the pain.
It isn’t about me or any belief,
I try help the loved ones to help with their grief.
There’s more than two options, to help people through,
So I’ll try and explain, what us Celebrants do.
We take an approach, with a personal touch,
For loved ones in need of the help for a crutch.
Some aren’t religious, but still want a prayer,
Or even a hymn, and we’re happy to share.
It just doesn’t matter what our belief,
We’ll use an approach, that helps bring relief.
So as you can see, it’s not black or white,
We offer a service that we just try make right.
Right for the person, whose life has passed on,
And try help those hurting, as their loved one has gone.
We tick all the boxes, some people say,
We try make it special, in our own unique way.
Times are a changing, changing so fast,
We must try move forward, not stuck in the past.
To help and bring comfort, is our real aim,
Each service is special, no two the same
Happy to meet to discuss what we do
At a time or a place chosen by you

27/03/2022

Five years ago on Mothering Sunday (she was very particular about the day being given its original name which meant quite a trawl round the shops for a card which not only had Mothering Sunday on it, but suitably soppy words too 💕) my mum was taken ill. The next day we realised she was dying and on 1st April, six days later, she died at home with us all around her. When the funeral director took her body away I gave them her Mothering Sunday cards which were still on display to put in her coffin with her. I wish I’d had to trawl the shops this year. I know so many of you reading this will be feeling the loss of your mums today, so I’m sending you big hugs 🤗

08/12/2021

Such a long time since I’ve posted on here, but I’m still doing what I do - meeting lovely families, listening to all the stories and creating bespoke services for those they are mourning. Still loving what I do. Still busy! I know Christmas is hard when someone you love isn’t around anymore and I saw this poem today which I thought I’d share with you.
Love to you all

If Christmas is hard,
If you’ve lost someone dear.
Just look in your heart,
And know they’re still here.

The star in the sky,
The light falling snow.
The robin outside,
It seems like they know.

If this is a time,
When you’re struggling through.
Just do what you can,
For what matters, is you.

There’s no need to be merry,
There’s no need to be bright.
Just do what you can,
It will all be alright.

Send a message to learn more

17/06/2021

Wonderful funeral yesterday for a steam enthusiast and long time volunteer and supporter of a local light railway. We held his celebration of life in the engine shed and the coffin was brought in by a steam train. Multiple tributes, five speakers apart from me and four pieces of music. Then his coffin was taken by train the full length of the line to meet the hearse which had driven on ahead and would take him (unaccompanied) to the crem. I just love being involved in something so imaginative like this!
(Photos shared with permission and encouragement of his family)

11/04/2021

Over this past year of lockdown I have conducted over a hundred funerals. At times we were only allowed six mourners and weren’t even allowed to enter the chapel, so I conducted the shortest of services outside on the tarmac. Sometimes I have mentioned in my opening words that actually a pared down funeral service would have pleased and suited the deceased, but more often it has been really hard for families not being able to give the person who had died the send off they would have wished. I have really felt the death of Prince Philip as have many others, but I am so grateful that the Royal Family are going to stick to the rules and I have a funny feeling that it might just have suited him! My deepest sympathy is with the Queen and all of his family.