11/10/2022
"Curiosity is what keeps me open to a sense of hope. It staves off negativity."
Carrie Brownstein
I woke up yesterday a little off and I knew I was going to have to proceed with caution. I love social media. I really do, but there are times when it takes a deep commitment not to accept the many invitations to dance with anger, cynicism, bitterness, and fear. I fight daily to keep my thoughts on "we" and "us" so that I don't feed the false narrative that I am not connected to those who have a different viewpoint. I also avoided the temptation to mother those who are vocal about how frustrated they're feeling. (Sometimes I assign myself entire circuses just so I can get upset about the monkeys.)
Once I navigated that, I came face to face with the highlight reels from friends who are enjoying the trip of a lifetime while I'm over here trying to get my laundry from two weeks ago done. I don't begrudge anyone the gift of travel, especially not some of my very favorite people but I'd be lying if I said that there aren't twinges of jealousy that nibble on my elbows and ears from time to time. So off I go looking for a pacifier for my whiny toddler brain that thinks everything is or should be about me.
The good news is that I have learned a thing or two about how to proceed on days like these. The first thing I do is quiet my mind with some kind of meditation. Yesterday I chose Zentangle. Zentangle is a meditative form of drawing that has some very specific guidelines that separate it from doodling. If you're curious about it, you can learn about it at www.zentangle.com
Next up, I got over myself by getting out of myself. Service of any kind is fast-acting medicine for self-centeredness and I found a couple of things to do to benefit others.
Finally, I ran an errand and on the way home, I turned off the GPS and meandered down an unknown road. See that tree tunnel? I found that in west McKinney. By indulging my curiosity, I saw something unexpected that calmed my spirit like a little love note from the universe.
Yesterday was actually an okay day considering I got to go to the DMV (twice). I'm pretty committed to loving my neighbor, and the good news is that I don't have to muster that up on my own. I know a power that has the power...staying open and curious keeps me flexible and those who bend are much harder to break.
What do you do to center yourself when you're feeling off?
