05/02/2021
She’d cried herself to sleep so many nights, trying to find a way to mend her broken heart.
What had begun not so long ago as a beautiful love affair had slowly decayed into something different ..something unhealthy.
She couldn’t tell you how she ended up in that place, filled with angst and darkness, only that the weight of the emotions felt oppressive.
It was worst when night fell and she was alone with her thoughts..her feelings.
She couldn’t sleep, barely ate and most of all, couldn’t stop her mind from thinking about..everything.
Everything that had happened, where she’d been or wondering how to make things better.
She had so many questions..and so few answers.
The pain of the recent past burned into her relentlessly, the words he had said that had torn her apart.
She tried to understand why he could be that way to her,
Someone he claimed to love dearly..
That’s when the reality hit her like a load of stones.
He didn’t love her as much as he loved himself and probably never would.
A solitary tear rolled down her cheek as the pain permeated her heart, as she fought not to be overwhelmed with the sudden rush of emotions.
As much as her heart screamed to stay and fight, her mind whispered what she already knew: she had to leave.
Her soul was weary from trying to save a relationship that had fallen apart some time ago.
It takes two people, she knew, to communicate and work through the problems that arise..
And he wasn’t willing to put in the effort.
She tried to tell herself that it wasn’t because he didn’t care, but for other reasons that she couldn’t explain..
Truthfully, she didn’t have to.
The road ahead would be harder than where she’d been, but she didn’t have a choice.
It was either move on or lose herself in the misery of a failed love..
And she couldn’t do that to herself any more.
She was better than that and deserved to be happy.
With a heavy heart, she knew she would never find the happiness with him the way she wanted.
It was time.
She had to break free and find her wings again.
For so long, she had forgotten who she was and even how to fly high like she used to do.
She wiped away the tears and ran her hands through her hair, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes.
It was time to start a new chapter.
It would hurt more than she knew, she’d miss him more then she wanted..but she missed herself most of all.
Sometimes, the healing hurts worse than the wound..
But it was a road she had to take if she ever wanted to be happy again.
Her time, her story.
The next chapter, she’d finally return home to herself..
And it was long overdue.
|ravenwolf
