Armadillo Life

03/12/2025

As part of Grief Awareness Week, I'm delivering this webinar for The Society of Authors and how to take care of ourselves at this time of year.

It's 45 minutes with your lunch, and will be of value if you are missing somone, or supporting someone who is. Even if you're just not feeling like Christmas.

If you're a member of the Society of Authors it's free to attend, but anyone can rock up for a £5 donation.

Do join us

https://societyofauthors.org/event/grief-awareness-week-how-we-look-after-ourselves-and-one-another/

16/01/2025

It's the second full week of January, a fog has set in, it's cold.

Yesterday, I listened to a fabulous talk about the importance of Oxytocin in handling stress.

Like the girlie swot I am, much of this resonated with me and got me thinking about my own habits and rituals that make me feel better.

Whether you're grieving, know someone who is, or just having a rotten week, I hope they're helpful.

Please feel free to add to the list!

Here are some ways to make yourself feel better, when you're grieving or just when life feels like a struggle.

27/11/2024

Most of us are missing someone this Christmas, maybe for the first year, maybe for 20.

Finding ways to include them in our rituals and traditions can be comforting, and can make everything feel lighter.

Ahead of Grief Awareness Week next week, I've created a memorial board where you can add a message and (optional) photograph of your person.

That way we can all know who they are and how much they are missed.

https://www.kudoboard.com/boards/c8TL97jt/armadillolife

🎄

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Posts can be anonymous if you wish, and there is no need to enter your email address. Even if you do, it will only ever be used to send you a link to the final board.

18/11/2024

This post reached 1 million impressions last week on LinkedIn.

I love that so many people have seen Fred's face, so I thought I would share it here too, for anyone already in the 'brace' position.

The photo on the left is my son Fred.

He wore this hoodie (hood up) throughout his illness to hide his bald head, because he didn't like hats and didn't want to look 'too cancery'

The photo on the right is taken from the McDonalds Christmas ad 2020, which they released the first Christmas after he died, with a wistful cover of 'Forever Young' I watched it on a loop.

When you're grieving, Christmas punches you repeatedly in the face and then kicks you in the kidneys.

They're already playing "Driving Home For Christmas" in the shops and lots of people will be adopting the brace position from here on in.

So, as you start to plan Christmas Jumper Days, Christmas parties and Secret Santa, remember to give some people the ability to opt-out, no questions asked.

Better still, make space for people's sadness where you can.

It seems weird that Grief Awareness Week is in December, as it spoils the mood a bit. But that mood is the reality for many people.

Marking it can be a compassionate way to show people that they are seen and valued at a tricky time of year.

07/10/2024

Grief Awareness Week returns for its 5th year on 2nd December 2024. It's a chance to open up conversations about grief and allow us all to support each other better.

Nowhere is this needed more than in the workplace.

Grief In The Workplace online sessions for organisations who want to create a compassionate place to work.
🌻 90-minute session for managers
🌻 60-minute session for teams and colleagues.

It will include first-hand experiences of grief, what helped, what didn’t and how we can create a more supportive, empathetic culture that will benefit us all.

Check out the link or book a call to talk about how your organisation can mark it.

https://guides.armadillosocial.com/grief-awareness-week-overview

25/09/2024

"THIS ISN'T EASY FOR ME EITHER YOU KNOW!"

Have you heard of ring theory?

It's one of the most helpful pieces of advice I have. It's also what makes our work colleagues such vital players in our lives.

It goes like this.

If you are in crisis (bereavement, illness etc), you are at the centre of the ring.

The people at the centre of the ring can do anything they like, and nobody is allowed to mind.

The next ring out, are close family/friends who have been affected by what has happened. They need support too.

But they can't get support from someone further in. They can offer support inwards, but they have to look for their support outwards.

And so it goes on.

Problems arise when people want or expect support from someone further in than they are.

People in the same ring are often quite bad at supporting each other because their pain is the same, but their needs might be very different, which causes conflict.

Often the most helpful people are in the 'next ring but one' to us, as they rarely need any reciprocal support.

🦸🏻‍♀️ which is why even though you assume people rely on those close to them in a crisis, colleagues can be the real heroes 🦸🏻‍♀️

Does this resonate with you?

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23/08/2024

On Monday, it's International Dog Day.

Dogs and grief go hand in paw, whether they are the cause, or salve.

In this article I look at why dogs are so important to us (and other animals) and why they also need some attention in bereavement policies.

I'm getting this post in early because Monday is also a Bank Holiday, and my birthday, and Dog Day should really be celebrating all of our joyful hounds, not thinking about sad things.

Dustin fully endorses this post.

Dogs are a man’s best friend, and a woman’s for that matter. So it’s only natural that dogs and grief go hand in paw.

30/07/2024

🥺 Aren't grief sessions very depressing? 🥺

One of the things I found difficult after Fred died was being perceived as a sad or miserable person.

I was devastated and broken clearly, but fundamentally, who I was hadn't changed. Some of my most treasured people are the ones who could continue to make me laugh, even when things were very bleak.

Talking about grief doesn't have to be depressing, or sombre. I wouldn't say it's a laugh-a-minute, and I'm unlikely to win any stand up awards (well maybe a very niche one), but if we are going to talk about the realities of life, we have to find ways to make it bearable.

Someone described my session as "... clear, concise, and presented with both gentleness and humour, which is exactly what is needed when dealing with such a sensitive topic.” which is exactly the look I'm going for.

My sessions are 60 or 90 minutes, usually online, and contain at least 4 references to Bruce Willis.

If you'd like to discuss arranging a session for your team, drop me a message or book a call.

https://calendly.com/armadillosocial/grief-in-the-workplace

30/07/2024

Last week, a client confirmed my first webinar for National Grief Awareness Week in December.

Have you thought about what your company will do yet?

It takes place every year in early December and is a chance for us all to talk about grief and what it means for us and those around us.

Here are a couple of ideas
🌻 A panel discussion where people share their own experiences of grief and what that has meant to them
🌳 A memorial tree or wall, where people can leave photographs or names of loved ones who have died.
🦋 Online or in-person session on what grief feels like and advice on how colleagues and managers can be more supportive.
👉 Remind people of support resources available to them
📖 Additional resources on your intranet
🗝️ A discussion of what an inclusive bereavement policy would look like.

If you would like to have a chat with me about what your company can be doing, then book an appointment on the link below.

I only have a limited number of slots available during Grief Awareness Week for webinars, panel discussions and speaking events, so it's best to plan ahead.

https://calendly.com/armadillosocial/grief-in-the-workplace

30/07/2024

I’m this week’s guest on the High Vibe Podcast 🩷

I’m talking to Dawn about how I got here, and my mission to make us all a bit more comfortable with grief and the grieving.

Everyone needs Dawn Owen in their life; the perfect combination of kind, generous and ‘come on woman, pull your finger out’

She has also brought me a group of fabulous women that bring genuine joy into my business, which is built on sadness.

I hope you enjoy it.

‎Show The High Vibe Tribe Podcast, Ep Episode 78 - The convo about Grief, Loss, Death & Bruce Willis with Louise Dillon - 16 Jul 2024

30/07/2024

I received some lovely feedback from the Grief In The Workplace webinar I delivered last week for the managers of Achilles Information Limited.

We can know and understand the theories of grief, but people also need "this is what this feels like" and "this is what helps with that" to be able to support the people around them.

People also value the time and space to think about these things, and what they mean for others.

We also included a Q&A where I try to answer all the questions you've been afraid to ask.

If you'd like to arrange a session for your team, then drop me a DM and we can talk.

30/07/2024

"You need to wait for the swelling to go down"

This week, I was asked about counselling and how to provide support while someone is waiting for it to begin.

Counselling is an important resource for lots of people, however often people try to offer it, or take it, too soon in someone's grief. We have an underlying belief that counselling will make everything better.

I often talk of grief as a physical injury, like a broken bone or an amputation. In that context we can see counselling as physio, of giving people help to rebuild their lives after a loss. How much physio (if any) will depend on the extent of our injury, and our individual capacity.

But you need to wait for the swelling to go down. You can't give physio to someone who is still bleeding, and you can't put a plastercast on something that is still swollen. This is why lots of organisations say you need to wait six months before counselling can start.

What people do often need straight away is support (pain relief, plaster casts, crutches etc). We need someone to say "I've got you, I'm here", people who will listen as we tell our story again and again.

There is a role for professionals in this, and charities such as 2wish Cymru provide invaluable immediate and urgent support. I've listed some other helplines below.

But also there is a role for everyone else to offer that listening support.

I know in the past I have rushed to counselling thinking I'd efficiently ticked that box, and then still needed it again, at a more beneficial time.

It's complex, but when offering counselling, think about whether that person needs physio, or a pair of crutches.

Cruse Bereavement Support - 0808 808 1677 - www.cruse.org.uk
Samaritans - 116 123 - www.samaritans.org
Grief Encounter - 0808 802 0111 - https://lnkd.in/e79M5Gdk