LDOT

21/07/2026

He’s coming home. 🌲

Southampton born and raised. Twice ranked top 20 in the world on the DJ Mag 100. Called “technically the world’s best DJ” by Time Out. James Zabiela has played every room that matters - Space, Fabric, Panorama Bar - and on Sunday 30th August, he’s bringing it back to his hometown.

High Tide continues the 25th anniversary celebrations, and there’s no one on this planet we’d rather have headline it. This is the hometown homecoming from one of the most respected DJs in the world - in the trees, where it belongs.

Swipe through the story, then get in whilst you can.

Tickets from £10 → link in bio.

09/07/2026

AND WE ARE READY FOR YOU 🔧🎉

Site’s looking even better than last year, absolutely love it when a plan comes together.

Sterling work to the entire team who have brought The Woods alive again for another fantastic Summer.

Can’t wait to see you all on Saturday for the opening party.

There are a handful of tickets left at fatsoma.com/the-woods

X

08/07/2026

50 left. 🎟️

That’s it - The Woods opening party is down to its final 50 tickets. This Saturday 11th July.

Strictly capped at 500. Always has been, always will be - it’s why it feels the way it feels. Once they go, they go.

Smokin’ Jo. One long day in the trees. Sun, sound, and the best people in the world.

If you’ve been sitting on it, this is the nudge.

Don’t watch this one from the stories.

Final 50 → fatsoma.com/the-woods

07/07/2026

CONFIRMED. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

The Woods will be showing England v Norway on the day.

Here’s how it works: the party comes first, always — but we know some of you won’t want to miss the football.

Sun through the leaves, a cold one in hand, Smokin’ Jo tearing it apart and the Three Lions on the screen. Hard to think of a better way to spend a Saturday with the best people in the world.

We’re onto the final tickets now, strictly capped at 500.

IT’S COMING HOME.

Final tickets → fatsoma.com/the-woods

06/07/2026

The Woods isn’t just a “party in the woods”.

It’s a unique audio-visual experience that has just taken a big step up.

Introducing the brand new 270° immersive stage — landing in The Woods for the opening party, this Saturday 11th July.

Wrap-around sound, wrap-around light, the trees closing in around you and Smokin’ Jo in the middle of it all. This isn’t a stage you watch. It’s a stage you’re part of.

Swipe to see it in full → then picture yourself in that crowd.

Strictly capped at 500.

Last tickets → fatsoma.com/the-woods

30/06/2026

150 left.

The Woods 2026 Opening Party — Gotta Have House, Saturday 11th July — is down to its last 150 tickets.

The woods are strictly capped at 500. That’s the whole point, and it’s why last year was what it was. Once they’re gone, they’re gone.

Smokin’ Jo headlining, one long day in the trees, food all day, ice cold bar, quadrophonic sound.

Remaining tickets from £10 → fatsoma.com/the-woods

10/06/2026

After last year, of course we had to do it again.

The old team are back together for two (very) exclusive dates this summer — two parties, one woods, just 500 tickets each.

Sat 11th July — Gotta Have House In The Woods
Sun 30th Aug — High Tide In The Woods, 25th Birthday (line-up TBA)

Due to the nature of the venue and party, tickets are strictly capped.

Don’t hang about.

fatsoma.com/the-woods

22/05/2026

We can’t wait to see you.

21/05/2026

17/04/2026

Your site scored 34 on Lighthouse. That is not a tech problem. That is a revenue problem.

Google PageSpeed is a ranking factor. A score below 50 means Google is actively burying you. Your competitors who scored 90+ are getting your traffic.

Core Web Vitals are not nerd metrics. They are revenue metrics. If your LCP is above 2.5 seconds, Google marks you as 'poor.' Poor pages rank lower. Higher ad spend.

60% of your traffic is mobile. Google scores mobile separately. Even paid traffic is affected. A poor speed score means higher cost per click.

Run your score. pagespeed.web.dev. If the number is red, We should talk.

Book a discovery call. Link in bio.