08/12/2020
The only thing that matters is what you believe in, period. It does not matter what your family says, what your friends think, or whatever anybody does. If you can find that which you believe in, and fight for it you will find your passion.
Continuing with conversation, once you understand that it truly can be lonely at the top, what next?
To clarify, it is lonely at the top when, tou have no one to share your problems and success with who really understands what it took you to get there. It is lonely when you have to bear the brunt of any decision that is made concerning your company and you have no way of offloading the burden of decision-making to anyone. Not that you cannot delegate, but because it is your responsibility. It is lonely up there when you have a vision, can clearly see the end game, but no one believes in you or your dream. It could be a number of issues that make you feel all alone.
Julia* is a mom of two teenagers. Julia is not married, but has been on several dates. She is employed as an administrator with a construction company, and to make ends meet she also has a side hustle, a consultancy firm. Between her day job and her consultancy work, her day is usually packed you wonder how she juggles raising two teenage kids plus have time to date. She is not a super woman, she confesses, but tries her best to be a responsible person.
On a typical day she would be handling employee and customer issues and often is responsible for the smooth running of things where she is employed. And as an administrator, she confesses that this job often exceeds 12hours of work. Unfortunately, she has a rather demanding boss who likes things done 'right now'. In between this, she also has to handle calls, meetings and deal with additional clients she has with her consultancy firm. On top of this she has to find time to make sure her kids are doing well, have done their studies for the day, are not in any trouble, and that their needs are met. To compound it all, she is human after all and there are days she just wants the company of another person who will either make her day special or make her feel special.
Although, Julia may find it easier to handle her day job since there are already structures in place, still she is either making decisions that impact others and herself which could result in either success or calamity. However, the same cannot be said on the rest of her day as a woman, parent and lover. In either of these cases she has to make decisions that only she can make.
It has been a struggle for Julia, finding ways to cope with the loneliness that comes with being a responsible adult and a business person. It has taken her 3 years to perfect the act of:
1 . Finding time for herself. Just her and no one else, to meditate and rejuvenate her mind, soul and body.
2. Never apologising for being human. She has her imperfections and she has accepted it and even embraced them.
3. Believing in all that she does and would not change events to be otherwise. Julia has understood the need to decide on a path and follow it with all that she's got. Her belief in herself and what she does is what fuels her day no matter how bad things get.
4. Allowing herself to be silly when she want to without worrying what other people will say. She is not afraid of being vulnerable, even when she is scared.
5. Following her 'why'. Julia has learnt the one lesson that most business people need to have, she has understood why she does not want to quit her day job just because she has a side hustle, or why she not be putting herself out there dating when she should be content to choose a husband and settle down. She knows why she fights everyday to keep her consultancy firm afloat when she could simply live on her income as an administrator.
You can only have the stamina to withstand the upheavals that come with wanting more, wanting a better life, wanting a purpose, wanting a passion in life, if you stand on your belief.
So, wake up everyday and fight for what you believe in. It will get lonely sometimes, but because you believe, you will always have something to push you forward.
Julia* not her real name