10/25/2018
feedthebot
By: Patrick Sexton April 27th, 2007
The Brief History of SEO
Public Relations
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This YouMoz entry was submitted by one of our community members. The author’s views are entirely his or her own (excluding an unlikely case of hypnosis) and may not reflect the views of Moz.
Time to get out of seo?
Google announces that the public can report paid links...
The entire SEO community sh*ts itself...
This is why.
The Brief History of Search Engine Optimization
Featuring:
Bill the Cat as SEO "experts"
Opus as webmasters
Cockroach as spammers
and of course... A mystery guest
Our story begins...
It was discovered that by taking some rather simple actions, search engine results could be manipulated and money could be made from the internet.
We are rich!
People who noticed this began talking to each other and using different techniques to manipulate the search engines even more. Search engines discovered this manipulation and sought ways to discourage it.
A search engine published the Google webmaster guidelines, which are a list of recommendations for
webmasters to follow. This gets the attention of SEO practitioners for a moment.
They take stock of things...
looking things over
They decide it does not really matter if you follow the guidelines or not and they continue business as usual...
party
Google sees that their suggestions are not being implemented and decide they need to somehow clean up the search engine results, which are being tainted by spam.
Enter (publicly, anyway) Matt Cutts.
Matt Cutts
Meanwhile, the number of people who are practicing SEO is growing...
(ACK stands for "Arrogant Crappy Krap"; "THBBFT" however doesn't stand for anything)
seo's speaking to each other
They begin to get together in groups, communicating more with each other and even sharing their wisdom with others.
more speaking
Back at Google, they are working hard at a solution...
the algorithm
But are finding the SEO community to be unruly...
neiner, neiner, neiner
Google goes on the offensive with an update to their algorithm...
Google goes offensive
The SEO community is set back; due to this new update some of their tricks are not working anymore and their
pages have stopped ranking well.
SEOs are on a couch looking worried
They notice that if they follow a couple of the Google webmaster guidelines, their pages go back up in ranking. They see that most of the guidelines can still be safely ignored, so major changes are not necessary.
Just a couple of new "tricks" and they are back to business as usual.
party
Now even more people are starting to learn SEO at conventions, and they start littering the search engine results...
lots of SEO's talking
Google notices this, and updates the algorithm again...
Google gets tough
Once again however, the SEO community sees that if they follow just a couple more of the guidelines they can once
again have top rankings. Back to business as usual...
party
Google warns that there will be an entire new infrastructure at Google called "I am your Daddy."
The SEO community gets scared.
yikes
The "I am your Daddy" upgrade begins...
charge!
..and many in the SEO community are affected.
ouch
A strange disease begins spreading throughout the entire SEO community. The disease is given the name
"why-the-f**k-are-my-pages-supplemental."
SEO in hospital bed
The SEO community tries to do a song and dance with their clients, explaining that this is just like all the other times.
song and dance
But they know in their hearts that this time it is different. They find they can get out of supplemental by following a
couple more guidelines, but their ranking still suffers...
"At least we can always buy links," they tell themselves.
talking to self
Buying links is against the Google webmaster guidelines, but I mean, come on, are they really going to notice?
The End.
by Patrick Sexton of Feedthebot.com
How to follow the Google webmaster guidelines
If you can't beat 'em, join 'em
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feedthebot
Patrick Sexton
11 years ago
Dr Pete, I know what you are saying as I was looking for images I was thinking the same thing...
Rebecca, thank you, and just so you know, after seeing my artwork on this site the Blistex company has approached me about illustrating the limited edition "whack people of search" series. If I do not get that t-shirt the one for you will have a goatee as well and your name will be - Rebecca "facial hair" Kelly. :)
feedthebot edited 11 years ago
3 0
chil_uno
chil_uno
12 years ago
That was awesome Patrick, a worthy comic at SEOmoz, thanks for a friday laugh.
3 0
feedthebot
Patrick Sexton
11 years ago
Chil, welcome to the premium membership! You have all sorts of stuff to read now, so I will leave you alone.
Take care and have a great time checking out the premium info. Those SEO tips are great aren't they?
5 0
chil_uno
chil_uno
11 years ago
Yes they are, very much worth it.
2 0
Dr-Pete
STAFF
Dr. Peter J. Meyers
12 years ago
God, I miss Bloom County. Thanks for that trip down memory lane.
3 0
vangogh99
vangogh99
11 years ago
I hadn't realized how much I missed it till just now,
2 0
rebecca
Rebecca Kelley
11 years ago
I like the photoshopped goatee on "Matt Cutts."
3 0
feedthebot
Patrick Sexton
12 years ago
Why thank you guys... Though I am confused why your "feedthebot" link goes to SEOmoz?
feedthebot edited 12 years ago
3 0
BartGibby
Bart Gibby
11 years ago
Ya, whats up with that link? maybe its a wysiwyg error. We'll blame it on the tech. That way no one gets hurt. :)
1 0
SravanSmith
SravanSmith
12 years ago
Great post Patrick.. It looks very funny characters...
2 0
vangogh99
vangogh99
11 years ago
The "I am your Daddy" upgrade begins...
That's the one that did it for me, Got to love the comic strip view on the world of search.
2 0
JaneCopland
ASSOCIATE
Jane Copland
11 years ago
I have determined that I am indeed the kitten in the litterbox when I am faced with a massive keyword research assignment and all I can see is Excel spreadsheets and Wordtracker reports.
2 0
feedthebot
Patrick Sexton
11 years ago
awwwww,
those excel and wordtracky thingies sound mean.
If reports are making you frustrated then, in my opinion, those reports need to get lit on fire and burned. Every once in awhile it is healthy to burn stuff. If the police come, you can blame me.
3 0
BartGibby
Bart Gibby
11 years ago
Dudes, like this is totally cool. While I am a little young to go use the "Way Back Machine" and remember chilling at the conferences. I still think this takes the "phpCake"!
I feel like making you one of those candy bar poster board thank you cards but with domain names. You know the ones that say: "Thanks for your posts, you're an SEO "Starburst", I wish you a "100Grand" for every one of your SEOmoz posts..."
But it would just take too long to be that creative, and besides I know more candy bars by heart than I do domain names :) This would be scary for my clients if it were true, lets not tell them shall we.
Cheers,
-Bart Gibby
1 0
feedthebot
Patrick Sexton
11 years ago
Thank you, that is really nice of you to say.
2 0
solid28
solid28
11 years ago
Your artwork totally makes you posts...
like this post...so classic
http://www.seoish.com/hitchhikers-guide-to-linkless-seo/
1 0
judd.exley
judd.exley
11 years ago
Oh man, so accurate yet so nostalgic. I miss Bloom County in the same way I miss being able to rocket a specific page to Top 5 in 3 weeks.
You rock dude.
1 0
CarstenC
CarstenC
11 years ago
Nice and funny comic. I agree with most but not on everything, but what is new there, right? As if the community ever agrees to 100%on anything.
We are not in East Germany (anymore) where things are "tweaked" until it appears that everybody agrees with what was said. :)
1 0
willcritchlow
ASSOCIATE
Will Critchlow
11 years ago
Lovin' it. Nice work ;)
1 0
RedDoorInteractive
RedDoorInteractive
12 years ago
Pat, an awesome display of humor, reality and truth. Thanks for the laugh!! FeedTheBot is sick! Congrats!! PB
2 1
FrancisLee
FrancisLee
11 years ago
really puts things into perspective for me
1 0
deCabbit
Judith Lewis
11 years ago
Very - VERY - cute!
Well done - that must have been a whole heck of a lot of work!
1 0
JaneCopland
ASSOCIATE
Jane Copland
11 years ago
The SEOs saying "THBBFT" and drinking very much reminds me of conferences. This is all remarkably accurate.
1 0
feedthebot
Patrick Sexton
11 years ago
Since I haven't been to one yet, the accuracy is due to SEOmoz coverage of the conferences (my only reference) so thank you for placing the right image in my mind. :)
2 0
Iluminet
Iluminet
7 years ago
Although very funny and interesting post, I was looking something more 'serious' or fact-based to include in my dissertation paper.Anway - no thumbs. ;)
1 1
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