10/09/2026
I thought I'd end up in William Gibson's Neuromancer. Somehow I landed in Pattern Recognition, with more spreadsheets and considerably worse vocabulary.
One monitor: Zuckerberg's advertising casino, bidding on human attention to sell tickets for my friends. I'm basically a digital bookie with a Meta login. LinkedIn calls it AI-native omnichannel demand orchestration.
Other monitor: a completely legal Icelandic gin pipeline, held together by liquor licenses, shipping regulations, and Shopify. Cyberpunk botanical bootlegging. Excellent compliance paperwork. Somehow, this is my actual job.